Monday 23 May 2022 by Mark Molloy

‘I’m fine without a carrier bag’ insists man balancing seventy-two items of food on his body


man holding groceries

A man refusing to purchase a carrier bag after forgetting to bring his own to the supermarket has insisted today that he is absolutely fine without one, whilst balancing seventy two items of food on his body. 

Simon Williams, who has forgotten to bring his carrier bags to the shops for the last twelve times he’s been shopping, insisted he didn’t need to buy one earlier whilst balancing four pints of milk on his head and squeezing a bag of potatoes into his jeans pocket.

Speaking earlier he told us “I’m fine, honestly. I don’t really need a bag”

“I popped to the shops earlier for a few things and forgot to bring my carrier bags again, for the twelfth time in a row”

“So the shop assistant asked if I needed to buy a couple of bags, at a cost of 20p each.

“I hadn’t really bought much to be honest and it’s only a ten-minute walk home so I told her I was fine and just grabbed all the stuff with my hands.

“Obviously it’s a little bit of a challenge carrying a full food shop including eggs, milk bread and fruit and various other items without using a bag, but you know, I just used every pocket I had and walked with my arms outstretched so I could balance things on.

“I didn’t look like a cheapskate idiot at all and only dropped a few things.”

Asked if it was worth it to save the 40 pence he told us, “Definitely. Well, apart from the eggs I broke, and the wine, and I lost three apples.”

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