Friday 29 April 2022

“But we VOTED for an unprecedented act of self-harm!” furious Brexiters tell Jacob Rees-Mogg


man angry at Rees-Mogg

Brexiters have been left furious at the government’s newly announced delay on Brexit checks on EU food imports at the border, insisting the self-harm it would cause is what they voted for.

Jacob Rees-Mogg announced a delay in the checks to 2023, claiming implementing them now would be “an act of self harm.”

Brexiter Simon Williams told us, “I voted for all of this, exactly as it has played out – this is precisely how I envisaged it going and I won’t hear any different. I wanted the self harm.

“Just because the minister for Brexit opportunities thinks our best Brexit opportunity is not implementing our Brexit deal doesn’t mean he’s right.

“Jacob Rees-Mogg has always been a secret Remainer. It’s the only explanation for his decision not to implement the Brexit we all voted for.

“And don’t pretend we didn’t know what we were voting for, the Remain side consistently said it was act of self harm, so we knew, we just didn’t care!

“I want an unprecedented act of self-harm, give it to me. Now!”

Rees-Mogg himself spoke to reporters telling them, “Brexit is still a wonderful idea that will deliver numerous benefits to our nation, it’s just that right now, the biggest Brexit benefit is in not actually doing Brexit.

“Some will no doubt insist that this means I was wrong about Brexit, but I’ve been clinging to outdated Victorian ideals for over fifty years, so if you think I’m going to change my mind about Brexit after six short years then I’m afraid you’ll be waiting a little while longer.

“Just because I’m now parroting Remainer talking points from six years ago as my reason for not implementing the Brexit border checks we negotiated in our Brexit deal, doesn’t mean the Remainers we’re right all along.

“It’s just a massive coincidence, obviously.”

Click below to get the definitive Brexit Venn Diagram!

The defnitive Brexit Venn Diagram

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