Wednesday 6 April 2022 by Arabin Patson

Prince Charles joins NewsThump writing team with provocative dadaist joke about Jimmy Saville doing PR for the Royals


Prince Charles laughing

The (barely) functional-alcoholic Warhammer nerds that write for satire website NewsThump have been joined by HRH Prince Charles following his hilarious debut piece imagining the royal family asking a notorious paedophile to help them be more popular.

Editor Simon Williams confirmed that the future king was now considered an avant-garde humourist and that his inclusion in the elite creative team behind NewsThump was based on merit, not fame.

He explained, “I know this looks like a stunt to generate buzz, but Prince Charles really grasped our house style of ridiculing the power players of this world using quirky fake articles with an ‘oof’ factor that can be quite shocking and, yes, generate controversy.

“He understands that satire needs to be something between a tickle and a punch in the gut.

“And he went full on with his first story about a family that is supposed to be the embodiment of tranquil continuity and a pyramidal class system asking a gaudy nonce to do their comms. It was particularly ballsy when you consider his own brother might have to watch Charles’ coronation from the protective custody wing of an American prison.

“We’re looking forward to more of his contributions. He’s already floated some ideas about the royals being so out of touch they expel the war veteran grandson and his glamorous actress wife while protecting the uncle who everyone thinks is a sex offender.

“On a purely personal note, he fit in surprisingly well with the team. He brought everyone those expensive Duchy biscuits and he was really good at pretending to care about Nurgle the Space Marine or whatever it is they giggle about.”

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