Thursday 24 March 2022 by Mark Molloy

Nestle pull KitKats out of Russia after Putin spotted eating one like some kind of monster


Putin bit out of KitKat like a monster

Swiss food giant Nestle is pulling KitKats out of Russia, after Vladimir Putin was spotted eating one like a fucking monster. 

With a number of western brands withdrawing from Russia due to its invasion of Ukraine, Nestle has immediately withdrawn its popular chocolate bar KitKat after it emerged Putin was eating them without snapping them into fingers, like an animal. 

A spokesperson for Nestle confirmed, “He’s a monster. An absolute monster.

“We have obviously come to expect the worst from this man, but this is just a step too far. It really is disgraceful. The man is not a human.

“He just fucking bit right into it, like he didn’t give a shit. Taking away a third of three separate sticks in one bite.

“It’s just abhorrent. We couldn’t believe what we were seeing and had to take some action so we’ve removed all KitKats from the country so hopefully this can’t happen again.”

Asked to comment on the news, a spokesperson for NATO revealed this evening, “That’s it. We are going to have to get involved”

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