Monday 7 March 2022

Ukrainian refugees hoping Tories will ignore the rules and let them in if they bring suitcase of booze


Ukrainian refugees

Refugees fleeing Ukraine have been told the best way to get a Tory minister to let you in – even if it’s against the rules – is to have a suitcase full of booze in tow.

After reporters emerged that just 50 visas have been granted by the government to Ukrainians hoping to flee to the UK, experts have said there are ways to get the Tories to bend their own rules if you know the tricks.

“A suitcase full of wine is an excellent way to get a Tory to let you in,” admitted CCHQ consultant Simon Williams.

“It really doesn’t matter what the ‘rules’ say, if you turn up at our door with a suitcase rattling with bottles of Chateauneuf du paper, then you going to get a warm welcome.

“Rules are really only guidelines anyway, so we can choose to ignore them if we want to. And nothing makes us want to more than the promise of a party.”

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