Everyone loves a party, but no one loves a party more than notorious Hollywood hell-raiser Oliver Reed or Boris Johnson and his number 10 staff.
See if you can tell which is which by figuring out which of the following list is a tale of Reed’s debauchery and which is an excerpt from top civil servant Sue Gay’s forthcoming enquiry into the Number 10 lockdown parties.
- ‘He spiked a 10-year-old boy’s cokes with vodka, getting the young child completely drunk’
- ‘Got so drunk that he sat on a child’s swing and broke it’
- ‘Drunk over 100 pints of beer and did a horizontal handstand’
- ‘Whilst inebriated, he got a tattoo on his penis’
- ‘A suitcase was used to smuggle a wide variety of booze’
- ‘Twelve drunken naked men were seen running through the garden, the moonlight glistening off their buttocks.’
- ‘A fridge full of wine was always well-stocked to allow for drinking at any time’
- ‘Drunkenly stripped naked and jumped into a tank of fish shouting “You can’t touch me! I’m the fourth Musketeer!”’
- ‘He took on the role of DJ and played music well into the early hours’
- ‘Shouted “who wants to see my mighty mallet?” before exposing his penis’
Answers: 2,5,7, and 9 are from Sue Gray’s report. 1,3,4,6, and 8 are Oliver Reed. Number 10 is both an Oliver Reed story and a description of Dominic Raab’s behaviour at a Christmas party, as taken from Sue Gray’s report.