Monday 10 January 2022

Man who spent years promoting Australian-style border controls now furious at Australian-style border controls


Nigel Farage unhappy with Australia's border controls

After spending many years insisting we should implement border controls like the sovereign nation of Australia, Nigel Farage has this morning lambasted Australia’s implementation of sovereign border controls.

Farage, who for some reason has become a freedom fighter on behalf of Eastern Europeans looking to move freely to other countries purely for short term economic reasons, insisted Australia needs to change its ways, and quickly.

“You can’t have countries implementing border controls that I don’t like, just because they have the sovereign right to do so,” he told his thousands of gullible followers.

“Australia should implement Australian-style border controls and then stick to them.  Changing the rules about who can and can’t come into their country – just because they have the sovereign right to do so – is the absolute definition of fascism.

“No, I don’t need a dictionary, I know what fascism means – I’ve spent most of my career advocating for policies drawn directly from the playbook. Game recognises game.”

Meanwhile, in a development that is thoroughly hilarious to sane people everywhere, thousands of angry simpletons have been tricked by Nigel Farage into getting angry about a sovereign nation deciding who they will, and won’t, let across their borders.

Derek Williams, 65, told us, “It’s outrageous! We didn’t win two world wars just so Australia could decide who gets to come into their country based on nothing more than the rules implemented by their democratically elected officials!

“Even Hitler didn’t discriminate based on vaccination status, so basically Australia is worse than Hitler.

“Yes they are, shut up!”

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