Thursday 23 September 2021 by Jack Marshall

BBC uses exorcist to lift ‘Strictly Curse’


Exorcist hired by BBC to end the Strictly curse

With the first live Strictly Come Dancing show just a few days away, the BBC has called in an exorcist to lift the infamous ‘Strictly Curse.’

It’s believed that the broadcaster was forced to take action after this year’s celebrities refused to sign a waiver agreeing not to sue them in the event of estrangement, divorce or pre-meditated murder.

Although there has yet to be an official announcement, witnesses have reported seeing a Jesuit priest sprinkling Claudia & Tess with holy water while saying “The power of Bruce compels you!”

If the exorcism is unsuccessful, BBC bosses are said to be considering other measures to protect couples such as asking them to dance in a pentagram, replacing Blackpool week with a trip to the Vatican and signing off each show with “Keeeeep praying!”

Not everyone, however, is supportive of the broadcaster’s plans.

“It’s a total overreaction,” said former Strictly professional Simon Du Williams.

“There hasn’t been an evil presence in the Strictly studio since Anne Widdecombe last danced the tango.

“If the producers really wanted couples with zero sexual chemistry that had absolutely no chance of copping-off with one another, all they had to do was use the algorithm that matches the contestants on Married at First Sight.”

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: