Tuesday 17 August 2021 by Arabin Patson

Exhausted Dominic Raab wearily begins grim task of completing TripAdvisor reviews about his lovely holiday

Dominic Raab exhausted

The Foreign Secretary has recently found himself put under huge pressure to decide if a mediocre tuna ceviche in the lunch buffet should cost half a star to a luxury resort especially since the staff had been so helpful finding the good snorkelling spots.

Through a series of leaked WhatsApp messages, the radical Brexiteer and loyal supporter of Boris Johnson revealed how taking hard decisions was taking its toll but that he was grateful there was nothing else for him to do this week.

They read: “Still in holiday mode so it feels a lot like work to write up my thoughts on the resort but I’m a trusted reviewer and with that role comes responsibility. I’m torn. On one level I want to be cold and detached so I can give people completely honest feedback but I’m also human and I can’t stop thinking about how the staff always put that extra dash of rum in my daiquiri.

“I guess it’s good practice to prepare for a return to the grind. But I promised myself I won’t read office emails. And I’m not watching the news because once you do that your mind starts immediately thinking about meetings and whatever.

“Not that anything will be going on at the moment. No summits, no ambassador positions to fill, the EU Commission is on hols and nothing ever happens in August anyway. Only wished it was always summer!

“JK, love the job and the FCO. It’s great knowing that you’ll be there and in the middle of it when history is made.”

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