Friday 13 August 2021 by Hannah Fox

Murder designed to terrorise not actually terrorism if murderer is white, confirm Police


man shrug

White men who kill based on a warped, twisted ideology with the intention of terrorising can’t be terrorists, a spokesperson for the Police has confirmed.

Instead, they should be referred to as ‘unwell’ ‘disturbed’ or ‘a well-liked family man who has suffered significant recent stress’.

Policeman Simon Williams said, “Terrorism is determined by skin colour or heritage. Therefore, a white person can’t be a terrorist, unless they are a woman campaigning for the vote, in which case they are a terrorist.

“If they are a black or Asian woman, they are doubly terrorist, like that fifteen-year-old who was groomed by ISIS. I mean yeah, she never actually killed anyone, and suffered terribly, but she is much, much worse than a well-liked family man who has suffered recent stress through no fault of his own.

“A lot of these white guys hate women and feel rage that they are denied sex, which I think we can all agree is completely understandable.

“You have to be careful what you say now, bloody PC Britain and that, but if you were to say mass murder was women’s fault then I’d possibly be inclined to agree.”

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