Friday 30 July 2021 by Chris Ballard

Cheaper to achieve Olympic level ability in Archery, Canoeing and Rowing than try those activities at Center Parcs


archery lesson

It costs less to train to elite level in a number of sports than it does to try them out when on your Center Parcs holiday, according to reports today.

Fancy having a bash at archery? You could pay through the nose for a session at Center Parcs or you could take the cheaper option – pay for years of lessons and professional equipment as you achieve the status of Olympian.

“I gave archery a go when I went to Center Parcs in summer 2010,” said holidaymaker Simon Williams. “I wish I’d known at the time that it would be better value for money to dedicate my entire life to becoming the best archer in the world.

“For the price of an hour-long session with instructor Dave, I could now have three Olympic golds and be knighted for services to archery.

“Plus, with Olympic success comes the chance for other revenue streams such as sponsorship and TV punditry. I might one day have earned enough to pay off that fortnight I spent in Longleat Forest during the school holidays.”

Five-time Olympic rowing champion Sir Steve Redgrave says he’s lucky that Center Parcs didn’t exist when he was getting into the sport.

“Yeah, it was just Butlins and Pontins when I was growing up,” he said.

“They didn’t even offer rowing as an activity so I was forced to seek out proper tuition.

“And the swimming pools were so full of piss that it was excellent practice at moving through water as quickly as possible, in case you caught some horrible disease.”

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