That Boris Johnson lies as easily as he breathes is a universally acknowledged fact; right up there with the Earth orbiting the Sun, two plus two equaling four, and Coldplay being a morose and vastly overrated band, led by the dullest front-man ever.
Here at NewsThump, we call the Prime Minister a liar in almost every article we write about him, as it serves two purposes; firstly, it conveys the epitome of the character of our democratically elected leader to anyone who happens to have spent the last decade living under a rock – of whom we are jealous – and secondly, well, it’s just easy copy.
In addition to calling him a liar we’ve called him a raft of other names as well. ‘Half-tumescent bag of lard’, ‘ balding bumblegit’ and ‘horny horny hippo’ were just some of the dozens of names we’ve called the adulterous blob of undiluted narcissism currently day drinking in Downing Street.
Some of our articles are read by tens of thousands of people who visit the site or stumble across us on social media, and some by only a dozen (yes, just us here in the NewsThump office), and we receive little to no media exposure for our daily outing of the Prime Minister as a ‘lying bastard’.
And yet when a Labour MP stands up in the House of Commons yesterday and tells those present what they already knew, she gets ejected from the house quicker than a semi-naked Boris Johnson barreling out the back door of a lover’s residence upon the sudden return of her husband.
Our writers’ self-esteem has an almost crippling dependency on exposure and the number of page views, retweets or ‘likes’ we get on social media, and to think that we’ve been calling the Prime Minister a lying twat since his mayoral days and are yet to be swept up in a media storm and heralded as heroes for speaking the truth to power is more than a little galling.
Don’t get us wrong, we love and wholeheartedly support Dawn Butler MP for the same reasons Boris Johnson must loathe her; she is honest, loyal, hard-working, she has integrity, and above all she cares deeply about her country and constituents, but it just seems that yet again, it’s one rule for the MPs and another for the rest of us plebs.