Thursday 8 July 2021 by Mark Molloy

‘I need to book Monday off work’ says entire nation


book time off work

The entire nation has suddenly decided it may need to book Monday off work it is revealed.

With triumphant England reaching their first major final in 55 years, to be played this coming Sunday at 8pm, everyone in the country, yes everyone, has suddenly decided that they actually need Monday off work.

Office worker Simon Williams from Manchester revealed, “Yep, it’s safe to say I’m not going in on Monday.”

“Not after partying all night if we go on and win the whole bloody tournament.

“Or drowning my sorro… in fact I can’t even think about that, stop it.

“I didn’t want to book it too off early because I thought it would jinx the result, so I’ve had to text my boss immediately to make sure I get in there first.

“It’s a dangerous game obviously, because if it’s already booked up by others it’s really hard to get away with pulling a sickie, when you’ve already asked for the day off.

“That’s why I texted my boss as soon as the second goal went in and booked myself into the pub.”

Asked what will happen if he’s told he can’t have the day off he told us, “Sickie. I know it’s blatant but like I say, I am NOT going in on Monday. Simple.”

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