Wednesday 30 June 2021 by Lucas Wilde

“Just because we boo the knee and cheer a little girl’s tears doesn’t make us c*nts” insist c*nts


England fan angry

A portion of England fans are insisting they’re “an alright bunch of blokes” this morning, despite the fact they’re obviously c*nts.

England’s football team beat Germany 2-0 last night in an objectively dull game which nonetheless advanced England’s dreams of Euro 2020 glory.

However, a few thousand England fans tarnished the evening by booing a brief anti-racism gesture and, later, cheering with glee at the sight of a visibly distraught German child.

“We’re not cunts though,” insisted Simon Williams, a cunt.

“We’re proper good lads once you get to know us. We’re just anti-anti-racism and we think distraught children are inherently funny. I suppose you’re going to tell me both of those things reflect badly on us? Alright, snowflake, calm down.

“We’re just expressing ourselves. Free speech and all that.”

Scientist, Hayley Rice, said, “We’ve done the research and Simon and his friends are definitely cunts.

“As we’ve said many, many times now, your right to freedom of expression does not come with immunity from criticism of that expression, particularly if you’re screeching with delight at the sight of a little girl crying, you utter cunts.”

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