Tuesday 29 June 2021 by Pete Redfern

Blasting a rendition of an American movie theme tune will be key to England victory, insists trumpet twat


England Fan using Trumpet

Hearing The Great Escape theme will play a key part in rallying the England squad to defeat Germany, a twat with a trumpet has declared ahead of tonight’s crucial match.

The theme tune, written by an American-born man of Austrian and Hungarian descent, is expected to be heard over and over again at tonight’s contest, rousing the England fans to ‘sing’ along and the German fans to be left unperturbed and a little amused.

Twat with a trumpet Christopher James told us, “Years of training, dedication, sacrifice, coaching, management, physiotherapy, blood, sweat and tears will all undoubtedly play a part in any victory that England may have at the Euros, but the one key factor will be whether the players can hear me blasting out The Great Escape.

“They will be reminded that this isn’t just a football match, it’s about World War Two or something, and beat those Germans just like we did forty years before I was even born.”

German fan Max Wilhelm responded, “Perhaps if the England fans focused a little more on history than learning a few bars of The Great Escape theme on the trumpet then they’d be able to approach the tournament with the correct sense of perspective and give their team encouragement for the right reasons.

“And I think it would be shrewd for the match officials to sentence any fans who turn up clutching trumpets or drums to the cooler for twenty days.”

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