Wednesday 9 June 2021 by Mark Molloy

Man arriving at holiday cottage with removal van baffled after discovering the price was to stay there for one week only

family holiday home

A man arriving at a UK holiday cottage in a removal van today is still completely baffled after discovering that the cost of the cottage was actually just to stay there for a week.

Simon Williams, who set off this morning, along with a large removal van containing all of his possessions after completing the sale on his house, realised his drastic error when the owner of the cottage informed him they would be back in a week for the keys because they had someone else booked in next week.

Speaking earlier, a perplexed Williams told us, “I don’t understand, Are you saying I don’t get to keep the house?

“I spotted the cottage on the internet last week and immediately liked it. I mean it’s a bit top end of my price range, and quite small really for the money, and definitely in need of some work, but I like the area and it’s quite close to the sea so thought I’d just go for it.

“But when I got here about an hour ago to move in some lady is saying that the price I paid was just to stay here for a week. A fucking WEEK! Are you taking the piss?

“Have you seen how much I have actually paid? I’ve taken out a mortgage for this, over twenty-five bastard years, and now you are telling me I can only actually stay here for a week?

“I knew something was wrong when they wouldn’t consider any offers and demanded the full asking price to be paid upfront.”

Asked what he’s going to do now he told us, “Are you SURE it’s only for a week?”

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