Tuesday 8 June 2021 by Neil Tollfree

Marcus Rashford seizes the means of production


Marcus Rashford seizes the means of production

Manchester United forward and avowed Marxist Marcus Rashford has announced that he has seized the means of production in Burton-on-Trent where the England team are based for the Euros, and that the communist revolution will begin imminently.

“Brothers and sisters, the time has come to rise up against the capitalist yoke,” he said, addressing supporters and reporters from the steps of the head office of Briggs and co, a Burton-based brewery and engineering company.

“You have nothing to lose but your chains.”

Rashford, like all of the England football team, are committed Marxists dedicated to overthrowing the traditional British way of life and introducing a communist system in which all property is owned by the community and all wealth is equitably distributed.

They have grown increasingly overt in their support of the Marxist doctrine over the last year by taking the knee before each game.

Initially, they claimed that taking the knee was a simple and dignified way to protest against racism, it has since become clear that it was actually conceived to promote Marxism to the people of Britain.

Although there was a small but dedicated group of red-faced angry men who understood what the gesture really meant and began booing whenever the players took the knee, many people who hadn’t done any research on YouTube just accepted the anti-racism explanation and did their best to ‘cancel’ the red-faced angry men.

Sadly, it is too late now, and the communist revolution is upon us, led by the England football team.

If only we’d paid more attention to the booing red-faced angry men.

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