Friday 16 April 2021 by Mark Molloy

America has lots of guns, it is revealed


America has a lot of guns

America has lots and lots of guns it is revealed today.

With news emerging this morning of yet another shooting of an unarmed person by US police, alongside yet another mass shooting of innocent people by a US citizen, experts have today concluded that America itself does in fact have quite a lot of guns.

Gun expert, and amateur mathematician Simon Williams revealed, “Yes, America does in fact have a lot of guns, and people tend to use them.

“I’ve looked at the figures, and it’s pretty basic maths, or math as they say in America. There are more firearms in the US, that we know of, than there are people. And that’s a lot of guns.

“With this in mind, and again, this is simple math, there are a lot of shootings in America, and a lot of people die. It’s quite a correlation really, but if you look closely it’s definitely linked.

“So in order to stop people dying, and to reduce the risk of future mass shootings, the simple answer would be to stop giving people guns.

“I’ve just thought of that myself, just then, when I was looking at the figures, so I’m guessing no one else has realised or surely they would have just done it and fixed their problem.”

Asked if he can think of any other ways to stop all the shootings across America without removing the guns, we were told “Erm….. we could just ask people to stop shooting, but the ‘not having guns’ thing, that would really help.”

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