Monday 22 March 2021 by Neil Tollfree

Buckingham Palace diversity report recommends replacing Royal Family with less racist Royal Family


Buckingham Palace, diversity report

In what many are seeing as a blow to the Royal Family, the diversity report ordered by Buckingham Palace in the wake of the Harry and Meghan interview has recommended replacing the Royal Family with a less racist Royal Family.

“It’s a tough report for the Royal Family,” explained Royal expert Simon Williams.

“I think that they’d have been hoping to have just got away with perhaps replacing Prince Edward with a Nigerian woman and perhaps marrying off one of Andrew’s daughters to a Chinese man, but they certainly wouldn’t have been expecting a recommendation to be replaced.”

The report recommends the Wilson family of Chelmsford, Essex as a replacement Royal Family.

“That’s right, and from what I’ve seen, the Wilsons would make for a far less racist Royal Family. The eldest daughter is going out with an Indian man, and the son plays trumpet in a ska band.

“They’ve never been carried aloft in a sedan chair by black men in tribal dress or asked an Australian aborigine if they were ‘still throwing spears’.

“No paedophiles either. Which is always nice in a Royal Family.”

However, it seems unlikely that the report’s recommendations will be acted on.

“No, I wouldn’t have thought so. The Royal Family may be a bunch of awful old racists, but then, so are the British people.

“So it’s a nice match really.”

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