Monday 15 February 2021 by Neil Tollfree

Harry and Meghan announce new baby in bid to annoy Telegraph readers


Telegraph readers unhappy Harry and Meghan having another baby

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex have, in what appears to be a successful attempt to troll readers of popular adult comic The Daily Telegraph, announced that they are expecting another baby.

It is understood that the couple were in two minds about whether or not to try for a second child, but the thought of the frothing fury of several thousand angry old racists proved too hilarious to miss out on, and so they decided to go for it.

Their bid to anger, irritate and annoy seems to have been successful.

“I’ve never been so furious in all my born days,” exclaimed 146-year-old Brigadier Sir Flight Lieutenant Norman St. Bilious.

“As I understood it, these two had decided to ‘retire from public life’ which, as far as I’m concerned, means that they should be living in a shed on the moon or something, not parading about in Canada like their foul union isn’t utterly unnatural.

“I’ve got nothing against the blacks, you know. I just think they shouldn’t be part of my royal family unless they’re being used as a footstool for Prince Phillip.

“And that’s not racist, it’s just telling it as it is.”

Simon Williams was equally furious.

“I can’t believe Meghan is back in the papers again. I’d successfully managed to put her out of my mind and now I’ve already had to have one confused angry wank already this morning, and I’m brewing up for another one.

“It’s just not on.”

In further a further attempt to wind up dreadful old right-wing windbags, the couple have confirmed that if the baby is a boy, they will be calling him Mohamed or Kanye, and if a girl – Beyonce.

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