Wednesday 20 January 2021 by Lucas Wilde

Removal team find Jeffrey Epstein’s severed head in Donald Trump’s personal fridge


epstein in the freezer

The removal team at the White House made a gruesome discovery while removing President Trump’s belongings.

Upon opening Trump’s personal fridge – a multi-compartmented behemoth of a thing measuring 12 feet by 5 feet- the team came across the severed head of the late ALLEGED sex trafficker with whom Donald Trump ALLEGEDLY had a close friendship, Jeffrey Epstein.

“We were shocked, but only mildly – like when you see a big spider in the bath,” confirmed removals specialist, Chuck Williams.

“At first we thought it was a really old ham, and we were still kind of right.

“We had a pool going as to what kind of messed up shit we would find. I personally had fifty bucks on a basement full of deceased Melania Trump clones.

“I think Frank had the money down on Jeffrey Epstein’s severed head showing up somewhere, so well done to him.”

Hayley Rice, a black ops team member, said “Ohhh THAT’S where that went.

“We were told to put the head in a lovely velvet bag, but I didn’t know where the bag was sent.

“Turns out it was sent to sit between a box of chicken wings and a tub of mayonnaise.”

A spokesperson for Donald Trump said, “The head will now sit on the rec room wall of Mr Trump’s new house.

“He wanted to display it in the Oval Office but one or two snowflake types around here thought that might be inappropriate.

“These are the exact types of ridiculous shackles from which the President cannot wait to be free.”

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