Saturday 16 January 2021 by Lucas Wilde

Aliens demanding ‘Take us to your leader’ asked if they can come back on Thursday


Aliens want to meet Donald Trump

Aliens have landed and have been urged to brace themselves for something of a disappointment, unless they would like to come back on Thursday.

Visiting earth from their home planet of Rathnark 41, visiting aliens Tynarb, Huthrall and Stacey touched down outside Phoenix, Arizona, and demanded to be taken to the leader of the free world.

“At which point I inadvertently sputtered ‘oh crap’, which wasn’t the best first impression,” confirmed Chuck Williams, first on the scene.

“They’re asking to meet President Trump and I can only imagine how spectacularly badly that encounter is going to go.

“This is a man who can’t get through breakfast without annoying the toast, so Christ alone knows what the consequences could be of him pissing off a technologically superior alien race, especially when we’re this close to having a grown-up in the oval office.

“I’ve asked them if they wouldn’t mind coming back on Thurday – suggesting maybe they could do some sight-seeing. There’s the Grand Canyon not too far away, or the Hoover dam if they like impressive feats of human engineering?  A little road trip for four days sounds nice, right?”

Alien, Tynarb, said, “We wish none of you any harm, and we come in peace to share our knowledge with you.

“We really wanted to be on our way home by Tuesday, and I can’t imagine that a ten-minute encounter with this President Trump fellow would change our minds on any of that. Surely he can’t be that antagonistic.

“No, we don’t have Twitter on our planet. Why?”

Delicious MAGA Tears – get the Mug here!

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