Wednesday 13 January 2021 by Arabin Patson

Man who calls Twitter bans ‘Orwellian’ very confused as to why people ask him about some Winston Smith chap


Angry man at his laptop

A human irritant that you kept on your Facebook feed out of foolish nostalgia is growing increasingly irate about being asked weird questions discussing something called Ingsoc each time he goes on a rant about Trump not being allowed to Tweet calls to riot.

Simon Williams, a perpetually outraged bellend you had the misfortune to share a school with, has once again littered people’s feed with a unique mix of hyperbole and ignorance.

He wrote: “1984 is a dystopia, not a manual. Orwell warned us that the first step towards Big Brother burning all the books is silencing the voiceless and the powerless like Donald Trump. I try to sound the alarm on my local jogging Facebook group but all the wokeistas who look down on me because they’ve never been to prison for benefit fraud just harass me with stupid questions about the Ministry of Love. Why are they asking me about nightclubs?

“Just this morning I wrote about Parler being taken off the App store as an example of the Thought Police at work and my sister started asking me demented shit about when I was going on telly. I never even watched that room 101 show!”

Mr Williams said that he expected to be trolled by the strangers he pestered into becoming social network contacts, but he was surprised that people he actually knew in real life had joined in on the act.

“Even my mates have told me I should change my name to Emmanuel Goldstein. But I’m not Jewish. I mean I put an Israeli flag in my Twitter handle but …….. well …….. you know.”

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