Wednesday 6 January 2021

Donald Trump claims ultimate victory in handing all executive and legislative branches of government to the Democrats

Donald Trump wins in Georgia

Donald Trump has declared his single terms as United State president a complete success after ending having lost the popular vote twice, being impeached, and handing complete control of the White House and Congress to the Democrats.

As the Georgia senate run-off draws to a close with both Democrats like to take their seats in the Senate, Trump has decided now would be a good time to redefine the word ‘winning’.

“This is a great success!” tweeted Trump to his hordes of sycophants desperate to believe what he says is true.

“I always wanted to lose two popular votes, and here we are folks, just as I wanted.  Impeachment? Of course I wanted it, what sort of president doesn’t want to write themselves into the history books?

“And what better way to cement a legacy of non-stop winning, that by giving control of the White House, the Senate and the House of Representatives over to the Democrats.

“Along with my half-built fence that Mexico hasn’t paid a penny towards, I think this is my greatest political achievement.

“Well, that and draining the swamp, which I have finished in the last couple of weeks by pardoning everyone in it.”

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