Wednesday 6 January 2021 by Pete Redfern

Donald Trump can have the empty jail cell he was saving for me, offers Hillary Clinton


Hillary Clinton offers cell to Trump

Hillary Clinton has offered Donald Trump the room that he had previously promised his supporters that he would put her in.

President Trump is facing almost certain jail time for literally inciting some kind of a fascist coup and instructing his halfwitted supporters to storm the Capitol building, which non-morons continue to insist is far worse than Bill Clinton’s Oval Office misdemeanours.

This will therefore inevitably lead to yet another impeachment, and so Hillary Clinton has kindly offered that if he finds himself imprisoned, then he can happily have the cell he had prepared for her.

“Ah, I remember those heady days of the 2016 debates,” she said wistfully to the press gathered outside her house.

“All that talk about how if he was President I’d be in jail, and all his followers chanting ‘lock her up’ whenever I was mentioned. Such great times.”

She added, “Still, I find myself not actually imprisoned, given that I didn’t collude with Russia, break any election spending laws, pay hush money to adult movies stars, contact Ukraine to dig up dirt on my opponent’s son or attempt to steal an election, so I think it is only fair to offer the room that Donald clearly had ready for me in prison back to him.

“I’m sure it was a perfectly decent room, and certainly better than staying at one of his dreadfully unhygienic Trump hotels.”

President Trump has responded by saying he won’t be going to jail as he has his best lawyer on the case, or at least he will have when he manages to find someone to replace his string of former and now convicted ‘best’ lawyers.

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