Wise men, shepherds arrested after mingling in the same stable

author avatar by 2 years ago

Police have arrested a group of farmworkers and self-described wise men who were found mingling in a stable with an unrelated family, according to reports.

The arrests were made after the group were told to return to their own homes and refused, allegedly telling officers they had been instructed to meet by a celestial choir and a great star of wonder – neither of which are recognised as credible sources of medical advice.

One of the wise men, who gave his name as Melchior, told us that he had ‘done his own research’ and discovered that he did not have to abide by recent social restrictions which required everyone to return to the town of their birth.

However, experts disagreed with the claims, warning that if people do not obey regulations there is a serious risk every family might lose any newborn children.

Police at the scene said that the group claimed death would have no dominion, but it was clear that mixing newborn children, people who regularly handle farm animals, and a group of international travellers posed a ‘serious’ risk making arrest necessary.

“They were all sat around the baby with lowing cattle, and the role of animals as a transmission vector isn’t fully understood,” one officer told us,

”We told them to break it up, and one man said at this rate it’d be safer to go to Egypt as they’d be less oppressed there, which seemed unfair as I’m only doing my job.”

When asked why his wife had given birth in a stable, Joseph said that his $600 stimulus cheque was not enough to pay the medical bills.