Tuesday 22 December 2020 by Pete Redfern

Priti Patel launches stand up career with hilarious gag about government being ahead of the curve


Priti Patel stand up career with joke about being ahead of th curve

Home Secretary and empathy black hole Priti Patel has got a future career in stand up off to a cracking start after delivering a splendid gag on the radio.

Speaking on the Today programme this morning about the government’s handling of the COVID-19 pandemic, she brilliantly quipped, “The government has consistently, throughout this year, been ahead of the curve in terms of proactive measures”, thereby paving the way for a career in stand up, and providing a contender for the funniest joke of the year, second to the concept of Matt Hancock being Health Secretary.

Unemployed ‘comedy expert’ Simon Williams spluttered out his Coco Pops when he heard the gag over breakfast this morning.

“Haha, that’s pretty good,” he told us when he had stopped chuckling.

“There’s so much packed into such a short gag. Firstly the idea of the Tories being consistent in anything beyond cronyism and self-interest is inherently hilarious. And then to imply that they are even aware of the concept of ‘pro-active measures’ is very smart, and shows a level of self-awareness I wasn’t expecting.”

He went on, “Priti Patel has surprised me with this, I’ll be honest.

“I had always thought that she was completely humourless – despite her constant smirking – and that the extent of her idea of comedy was giggling at dinghies sinking in the English Channel.

“How wrong I was!”

Priti Patel has already secured a Netflix special, which will be called ‘Witty Patel: Tellin’ Jokes To Hard Workin’ Families But Not Illegal Immigrants’ and will be available to stream in 2021.

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