Tuesday 8 December 2020 by Lucas Wilde

Bill Gates rounds the corner and rips off his vaccine nurse mask before cackling maniacally


Bill Gates injects first vaccine!

Bill Gates is at it again!

The founder of Microsoft, renowned philanthropist and *checks notes* ‘most evil man in all of history who wants to track and enslave us all’ has successfully injected his first microchip, disguised as an NHS nurse.

Gates successfully infiltrated an NHS hospital, disguised as a female nurse, in order to inject his first microchip personally.

“AHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHA!” cackled the big nerd, ripping off his disguise as lightning split the sky.

“You FOOLS! Now I can track you all in ways that were not previously possible with your computers, mobile phones and satnav fitted cars! HAHAHAAAAA!

“And of course, I started with the most important, strategic target of all: a 90-year-old English woman.

“Watch out, Margaret, because now I’m going to know EXACTLY when you go to the bingo.

“This is just the beginning, I’m going to inject ALL of you with microchips, because reasons.

“Now, having revealed my plan, I’m going to have to kill you. So please stand next to this 5G mobile phone mast until the cancer rots your brain.”

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