Wednesday 4 November 2020 by Davywavy

Donald Trump pledges to build a wall round the White House to keep reality out

Trump wall reality

Sort-of President Trump made his latest attempt to hang on to high office this morning by pledging to build a wall that will keep unpleasant realities out of America.

Trump, who used his speech to declare war on facts, told a group of supporters – his two sons and a woman in big sunglasses who isn’t his wife – that he was going to build a ‘big beautiful wall’ around the White House so he wouldn’t have to leave.

“There are some people saying I’ve lost the election. I don’t know but they’re saying it,” said Trump.

“But I’m gonna build a wall – bigger and higher than the first one I didn’t build – and the Democrats are going to pay for it.”

When asked how he would compel his opponents to pay, Trump called anyone who disagreed ‘low-IQ’ and said they’d just have to believe him.

When asked, Democratic candidate Joe Biden said that he’d already donated to the wall by throwing a brick through the Oval Office window.

”It had a note on it saying ‘get out of my chair,” he added.

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