Wednesday 2 September 2020 by Neil Tollfree

Morrissey confirms he’s fine with Donald Trump using his music for rallies


Morrissey, Trump rally

Indie Dads’ favourite racist singer-songwriter Morrissey has made it clear that he is fine with Donald Trump using his music for rallies.

The announcement comes in the wake of legal action from everyone from The Rolling Stones to Mr Blobby to prevent their music being played at Trump’s rallies.

“I would be honoured if Mr Trump were to use my music during one of his delightful rallies,” said the horrible eighties icon.

“I, personally, would recommend my 2011 b-side ‘I hate black people, they’re awful and should just go back to where they came from’ as being something that would chime perfectly with Mr Trump’s ideals and audience.

“Naturally, I find myself with great sympathy for Mr’s Trump’s philosophy and policies as I’ve lost any trace of the wit, compassion and decency I had back during my heyday.

“The only thing I would request, though, is that the rally only served vegan food. Unless, of course, it was just really, really racist. In which case, I’m happy to forgo my vegan principles on this occasion.”

President Trump has yet to comment, but rumours are circulating in Washington that the President is very pleased with Morrissey’s offer and is considering him bringing the singer into his cabinet as Secretary for Racist Songs.

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