Friday 28 August 2020 by Alex Webster

Conspiracy theorist who refuses to wear a mask still confident tinfoil hats are effective


conspiracy theorist wearing foil hat

A man who thinks COVID-19 is a hoax and that masks are completely pointless and nothing more than a badge for the gullible, still believes the CIA is reading his thoughts and only his tinfoil hat can protect him.

Simon Williams, a full-time conspiracy theorist from Swindon, maintains that Coronavirus does not, in fact, exist and was simultaneously created in a lab by a shadowy cabal of billionaires to control world markets.

Speaking from his sound-proofed ‘information centre’ in his back bedroom, Mr Williams blogged, “I mean sure, you can make anything look convincing if you use scientific methodology confirmed by multiple independent research bodies.

“But remember this; that’s what they want you to think. As an experienced conspiriologist, I would remind you that you can use that maxim to counter any rational or considered argument.

“Covid-19 is a completely fictitious disease invented, to boost pharmaceutical sales and as such any true patriot would refuse to wear a mask like the mindless sheep following the MSM narrative. Well, unless the mask was a Guy Fawkes one, maybe.

“On the other hand, the risk of having your brain ‘hacked’ by one of the many three-letter agencies that has perfected brain-hacking technology is a very real threat. Microwaves were invented by the CIA in the 1940s to read people’s brain waves, I’m sure you all know that already.

“The foil in my headgear blocks the beams, it’s the only thing that can. That’s why in all these years the CIA has never successfully read the mind of a Chinese takeaway.”

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