Desperately unlucky Vladimir Putin loses yet another opponent to poisoning

author avatar by 3 years ago

Russian President Vladimir Putin has been the recipient of sympathy calls this morning after it was revealed he has lost year another political opponent to poisoning.

As world leaders across the globe manage to do political battle with numerous foes without any of them succumbing to unknown poisons, the desperately unfortunate Putin appears to have yet another one fall to poisoning while on a flight to Moscow.

A Russian government spokesperson told us, “Vladimir was looking forward to the ongoing debate with Alexei Navalny on the political battlefield, but unfortunately the cruel hand of fate has deprived him of that victory.

“It is so desperately unlucky that these political opponents and critics keep falling in mysterious circumstances before Vladimir can defeat them in the court of public opinion of our homeland.

“Each time one of them dies, another opportunity is lost for Vladimir to demonstrate what a political great leader he is.  Vladimir is truly the most unlucky leader in the world.

“You know, it would be nice if one of them could live for more than a few months and face Vladimir at the ballot box.

“I guess we should all keep our fingers crossed for whoever decides to challenge him next.