Everyone shocked that organisation which exists solely to promote weapons is run by crooks

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Everyone has been left shocked today after the New York attorney general sued to dissolve the NRA, with revelations that an organisation that exists solely to promote weapons of murder is actually run by crooks.

Alleging that leaders including Wayne LaPierre embezzled $ 64m, prosecutors insist they were surprised to find that leaders who have relentlessly promoted free access to the tools that kill thousands of innocent Americans every year, could also stoop so low as to steal some money.

One shocked citizen told us, “Failing to help protect the nation’s children in schools is one thing, but stealing money from NRA members is another altogether.

“I could sort of turn a blind eye when the NRA spent millions to ensure no laws were changed in the aftermath of twenty young children being shot to death at Sandy Hook, but taking some money that wasn’t theirs? That’s just the lowest of the low.

“When Wayne LaPierre stood in front of this nation time and time again to insist the latest mass shooting was nothing to do with the tools used to do the shooting, I genuinely thought he might be one of the good guys.

“It’s rocked my very faith in the American way of life to learn that this man – a man who has spent his lifetime dismissing the murders of thousands and thousands of Americans – could be capable of such an evil financial crime.”

NRA member Chuck Williams told us, “I got an email from the NRA this afternoon to say this is a witch hunt and that it’s in the constitution that the leaders of the NRA have the right to defraud whoever the fuck they like.

“Who am I to argue?”