Thursday 16 April 2020

NHS staff can stitch together new ‘CARE’ badges to make a rudimentary face mask, confirms Matt Hancock


Care badges stitched together to form mask

Health Secretary Matt Hancock has responded to criticism of his announcement to provide front-line NHS and care workers with a badge to identify them in public, by insisting they can be stitched together to form a rudimentary set of Personal Protective Equipment.

As the lack of PPE for front-line staff dealing with Covid-19 continues to be a major issue, Hancock has insisted that a scheme to give people nice shiny badges is just what the nation needs at this time.

Hancock told reporters, “Not every health worker wears their uniform to work, or when they’re away from the hospital, so this means we can recognise them and give them the respect they deserve when they’re not working.

“We think these workers getting so much respect while they’re not at work will more than make up for the lack of respect they seem to be getting while they are at work.

“As for the lack of PPE, did you know these badges are not limited to one per person, and when they have got a few they can stitch them together to form a basic face mask which they can use when caring for people with a disease that has so far killed more than thirty of their colleagues.

“These badges not only send a nice message when worn, but they are also practical in fighting Covid-19. Probably. Don’t hold me to that.”

Nurses have welcomed the new badges, with one telling us, “It’s nice to finish a 14-hour night shift dealing with the most horrific scenes I’ve witnessed in 20 years as a nurse, only to find out I’m being rewarded by the Health Secretary with the same level of gratitude as a nine-year-old who had written to Blue Peter.

“Thanks for that.”

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