Tuesday 7 April 2020 by Chris Ballard

Miss Polly self-isolating after Dolly displays coronavirus symptoms


polly had a dolly that got coronavirus

Miss Polly had a dolly who was sick, sick, sick so she’s now self-isolating for seven days.

Dolly owner Miss Polly won’t be going anywhere for a week after her small figurine fell ill.

We spoke to Miss Polly on Skype.

“I feel absolutely fine myself,” she said. “But Dolly is displaying classic coronavirus symptoms.

“I went to get her yesterday morning for her usual breakfast of wooden toast and invisible tea from a musical teapot when I noticed she was burning up. She was also coughing uncontrollably.

“I checked her temperature and sure enough she was sick, sick, sick.

“I immediately called the GP surgery and asked if there was any chance a doctor could come quick, quick, quick.

“Unfortunately they said not in a million years and told me that we just had to stay at home for a week.

“This makes life really awkward as it’s impossible to get an online grocery delivery and Dolly is running really low on varnish.

“I considered going private – maybe some Harley Street consultant could give her a pill, pill, pill? But there’s no way I could afford the bill, bill, bill – not on my meagre earnings as a nursery rhyme character.”

Despite the inconveniences of quarantine Miss Polly is trying to stay positive.

“Well, it is what it is – there’s not much I can do is there? I just sent Dolly straight to bed and then put the kettle on,” said Polly.”

Although that led to an argument with Suki, but that’s a whole other story…

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