Tuesday 17 March 2020

Coronavirus sees summer delayed until October


Summer postponed until October

Boris Johnson has addressed the nation to announce that due to the ongoing spread of the Coronavirus, Summer has been postponed to October.

After football, concerts, theatre were all postponed, it is now the turn of the nation’s favourite season to face postponement in an attempt to stem the spread of the virus.

The decision has proven popular with the public, including 27-year-old office worker Simon Williams, who told us, “It’s about time that Boris got a decision right, and I think we can all agree he’s nailed it here.

“Being confined to my home while the weather is great? That would be awful. No-one wants to stay inside at home when the sun is shining.

“Delaying the summer until the crisis passes is definitely the right move. I am very happy that the rain, grey skies and colder days will continue until the end of the coronavirus epidemic.”

However, some of those currently staying at home insisted that simply delaying the summer until October is going to throw the whole year into chaos.

57-year-old Derek Matthew told us, “If we’re having summer in October, what does that mean for our prospected of a white Christmas? We’ll probably still be in shorts by December.

“We’re not bloody Australians!”

Meanwhile, government insiders have said Boris might sweeten the deal even further for those unhappy that Summer is being moved from its traditional slot by banning Mondays altogether.

This article was first seen on our French partner site, Le Gorafi – the original can be read here.

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