Woman would find giving up work for Lent far easier than coffee or chocolate

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Local woman Simone Williams is wondering if she can give up going to work for forty days rather than the usual caffeine or chocolate this morning.

Simone, who usually uses the old tradition of Lent to try and lose a bit of weight for her holidays, woke up this morning and thought ‘Fuck it’ before deciding that not going to the office for a month and a half would be far more rewarding.

“You’re supposed to try and make positive changes which improve your life in Lent,” she told us. “And I can’t think of anything much more positive than not hanging round in a mid-90s industrial estate listening to Spandau Ballet on Heart FM all day.

“I could use that time much more constructively by watching a Storage Hunters Marathon on Dave.”

If giving up work goes well, Simone says next year she might have a crack at giving up shaving her legs.

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“I’m sure it’ll be a struggle, but I’ll manage somehow,” she said.