Thursday 16 January 2020 by Neil Tollfree

Countries to step up efforts to blame different countries for climate crisis


Boris after David Attenborough warns of climate crisis

In the wake of David Attenborough’s plea to address the climate crisis, countries have stepped up efforts to blame different countries for the situation the planet finds itself in.

The first country to swing into action following Attenborough’s statements was Great Britain who launched a scathing attack on other countries for not addressing the climate crisis.

“It seems clear that China and India are huge world polluters and until they take steps to address climate change then the crisis will continue,” said comedy Prime Minister Boris Johnson.

“Also, I’ve got a bike so…you know.”

Other Western countries echoed Mr Johnson’s comments.

“Oui, is their fault,” said Emmanuel Macron, from his gold throne.

However, China’s President Xi Jinping was quick to respond.

“That’s bollocks,” he claimed.

“Everyone knows that it’s the West who spent the last two-hundred-years pumping all sorts of goodness knows what into the atmosphere.

“We’ve only been a serious industrial nation for a few decades so it can’t be our fault.”

President Trump, as ever, had his own take on the situation.

“It’s Obama’s fault,” he declared.

It is expected that whilst governments waste time squabbling over who is to blame for the climate crisis, Attenborough will be developing an energy-efficient spacecraft to take him to a different planet where the indigenous species aren’t so hell-bent on their own destruction.

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: