London Bridge counter-terrorism failure is all Jeremy’s Corbyn fault, insist people who’ve been in charge of everything for a decade

author avatar by 5 years ago

The Conservatives, who have held the reins of government since 2010, are adamant than a man who has never been so much as a local councillor is to blame for the failures of the judicial and security apparatus of the UK that allowed the London Bridge murders.

In an early morning press release, CCHQ launched a scathing attack on Jeremy Corbyn for forcing Tory ministers to starve probation services of funds and cut 20,000 police officers even though he was an unknown backbencher until 2015.

“The recent attacks show the dangers of a soft touch on terrorism by a man who has never had any control over any of the instruments of the state that we can use against violent extremists. Once again, Jeremy Corbyn is refusing to take responsibility for his actions and hiding behind his complete lack of official role.

“Where was he when we gutted the rehabilitation services for Islamist prisoners? Why didn’t he step up when we did sod all about monitoring dangerous extremists and just passed legislation allowing the Home Secretary to strip teenage mums of their British citizenship because that makes Daily Express readers happy?

“Jeremy Corbyn can’t avoid his responsibility for a decade of incompetence, short-sighted cuts to security services and knee jerk anti-terrorism policies designed solely to get good headlines in right-wing tabloids.”

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In response, the Labour Party has defied expectations that they would pounce on this occasion to highlight how the Conservatives are irresponsible fuck-ups, instead opting for a long and tedious speech by Jeremy Corbyn highlighting how he was right about Iraq and why Tony Blair is evil.

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