Saturday 30 November 2019

BBC planning to disguise Andrew Neil as Andrew Marr for Boris Johnson interview


Andrew Neil disguised as Andrew Marr

The BBC has a cunning plan to thwart Boris Johnson’s ongoing attempts to avoid being interviewed by Andrew Neil.

The prime minister is currently doing everything in his power to avoid being interrogated by the relentless scot, after seeing him tear into both Jeremy Corbyn and Nicola Sturgeon with such ferocity that the nation has been left tumescent at the thought of him interviewing Boris.

For the last week, Boris has steadfastly evaded approaches from Andrew Neil’s team with all the deftness of a rogue father evading the child support agency.  Something he may or may not have experience with.

A Tory party insider told us, “Boris is petrified. His boyish-charming-idiot routine works in 95% of places, but on national TV in front of Andrew Neil it simply won’t cut it. He’ll be faced with questions regarding lies he’s definitely told, words he’s definitely said and problematic and ill-considered policies that he definitely wants to implement.

“We don’t need that – we’ve got an election to win. So yes, we’ll be avoiding Andrew Neil and going for the much softer touch of Andrew Marr.”

We approached the BBC after speaking to the Tory insider about their belief that they have successfully avoided scrutiny from Andrew Neil, and a producer on the Marr Show told us, “That’s what they think.

“We’ve spent the last few hours creating an Andrew Marr prosthetic for Andrew Neil, which he will wear right up until we start broadcasting live.  It’s like something out of Mission Impossible.

“There’s not a lot we can do about their respective body shapes, they’re not even remotely similar, so we’re just relying on the fact that Boris isn’t the most observant chap in the world.

“Yes, we’re feeling pretty confident.”

Make David Attenborough Prime Minister – get the T-shirt!

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