Lib Dem promise “to deliver the moon on a stick”, is fully costed, party insists

author avatar by 4 years ago
NewsThump Needs Your Help

In an attempt to outflank spending pledges by Tory and Labour candidates in the run-up to the general election, Lib Dem leader Jo Swinson has promised every voter the moon on a stick, should the Lib Dems be returned to power on 12th December.

“The other parties are pledging massive spending programmes and an end to austerity, in their bid to woo voters,” she explained. “But we’ve gone one better than that.

“Under a Lib Dem government, every individual voter will receive their own personal stick-mounted moon as proof of our commitment and integrity.”

Other Lib Dem promises include “winning Euromillions tickets for everyone”, “free unicorn rides” and “an end to tuition fees.”

But voter Simon Williams, 37, was unconvinced.

NewsThump Best sellers

“To be honest I was quite tempted by the unicorn rides,” he confessed.

“But when it comes to the Lib Dems promising to end tuition fees, well, they got me with that one before.”