Tuesday 5 November 2019

Facebook becomes FACEBOOK to more closely align with its shoutiest online communities


Facebook rebranded as FACEBOOK

Facebook has rebranded as FACEBOOK to ensure those communities that insist on posting in all-caps feel much more at home on the platform.

The rebrand comes at a time when the social network is under increasing pressure for allowing fake news from the only people who really benefit from using it.

Facebook executive Simon Williams told us, “What we’ve found is that people really love to shout online, like really shout.

“If you’ve got a good point online, you want to shout it, and the way to do that is with all caps. Conversely, if someone else has a good point, the best way to shout them down is with all-caps.  All roads lead to all-caps.

“Facebook becoming FACEBOOK was the only logical conclusion.”

Meanwhile, Facebook users have welcomed the rebrand, insisting they finally feel at home.

“OMG. THIS IS SO AMAZING!” said Facebook user Shelly Matthews.

“MY BOYFRIEND IS ALWAYS TELLING ME TO STOP YELLING, WELL NOW FACEBOOK IS ALL ABOUT YELLING – ALL THE TIME – SO FUCK YOU KEVIN!”

“I SUPPOSED IT’S GOING TO BE A BIT DIFFICULT TO LEAVE A COMMENT WHEN A FRIEND POSTS SOMETHING LOOKING FOR ATTENTION OR SYMPATHY, BUT THAT’S A SMALL PRICE TO PAY TO FINALLY BE MYSELF ONLINE.”

Facebook’s Williams concluded, “Yes, I realise the timing of this is quite fortuitous, but If you could all keep talking about this rebrand and not the fact that we’ve effectively given the go-ahead for a Fake News war during the UK general election, that would be great.”

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