The Conservative party has insisted that prime minister Boris Johnson has no intention of asking the EU for a Brexit extension, despite legally being required to do so, because obeying the law is for pussies.
After an amendment was passed in parliament this afternoon ensuring the terms of the Benn Act could not be met until the deal is legally enforced, Boris was left in a position of having to ask for an extension beyond 31st October.
However, the Tory party has insisted that this won’t be happening, because delivering the Brexit they’re pretending people voted for is definitely more important than obeying the law.
Conservative HQ spokesperson Simon Williams told us, “Boris is obviously disappointed at today’s events, and how parliament voted – but mainly because Saturday is the day he normally spends trying to help his more attractive constituents.
“However, we must be very clear on this – there will be no request for an extension from the prime minister or anyone at number 10. And simply saying ‘but you have to, it’s the law’ is not going to sway us one way or the other.
“When we say we are the party of law and order, we mean imposing law and order on other people, not obeying it ourselves. That would be ludicrous.”
“Boris will do what he likes, when he likes, and how he likes – just like he always has.
“That can’t come as a surprise to any of the voting public. If they didn’t like how he does things then they shouldn’t have voted for him to be prime minister.”