New evidence that Karma exists after report finds Leave-voting areas will be hardest hit by no-deal Brexit

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What goes around may indeed come around, according to new research carried out last week.

A report leaked yesterday has revealed that 29 out of 33 areas that would be hardest hit by a no-deal Brexit were ones that had actually voted for the monumental act of national self-harm.

The list of the areas that would be most vulnerable to job losses in the event of Britain leaving without a deal was compiled under the codename ‘Operation Kingfisher’, and was marked as ‘highly confidential’, presumably because the government wanted to hide the fact that a number of areas had overwhelmingly voted to shoot themselves in the foot.

Simon Williams, a Leave voter from Dover who is in favour of Brexit because his only source of information is the Daily Mail and the Leave.EU Facebook page, reacted with surprise to the news.

He told us, “Hang on, I voted to leave in 2016 because the paper said that Romanians would take my job, then claim my benefits, and then kill my family dog, or something. Plus I didn’t want the Muslims to ban Christmas.”

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“I haven’t actually spoken to any Romanians, or met any Muslims – to confirm this – but it’s just a well-known fact, innit. So I thought, you know, get out of Europe and then there’ll be loads of jobs to go round.

“It’s weird – Boris Johnson said that Brexit would be good for jobs, so I don’t get it. It’s not like him to lie, is it?”

Government spokesperson Christopher James told press this morning, “We are devastated by this. Not by the fact that there will be job losses – by the fact that our report was leaked, revealing that the areas that voted to leave might suffer job losses.

“But some new jobs will be created – we will need parking attendants in Dover when it becomes one huge lorry park, for a start.”