Wednesday 2 October 2019 by Pete Redfern

Boris Johnson sends photo of his penis to every Conservative Party member within minutes of getting Snapchat


Boris Johnson joins snapchat

Johnson’s Johnson is already doing the rounds on Snapchat, according to reports.

Within one hour of joining Snapchat this morning, the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom diverted his attention away from discussing a withdrawal agreement with the EU onto taking a photograph of his penis.

Having downloaded Snapchat under the impression it was a covert dating app that would escape Carrie’s scrutiny, Boris apparently set about wasting no time in sending a dick pic to everyone on his contact list.

Conservative MP Simon Williams told us, “We all know that Boris and the term ‘prize bellend’ are synonymous, but we didn’t want to actually see it.

“I’ve spent the last hour pouring bleach into my eyes but it’s not helping get rid of that image at all.”

He added, “Oh no, another one’s come through now, let’s have a look at-” before promptly vomiting all over the floor.

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