Wednesday 25 September 2019 by Lucas Wilde

Reminder: Prince Andrew might be a nonce


Prince Andrew might be a nonce

With all the bru-ha-ha around Brexit, Boris Johnson and climate change at the moment, the public are duly reminded that Prince Andrew MIGHT have had sex with underage girls.

Various allegations still surround the Prince with several witnesses coming forward and saying that they were coerced into having sex with him while they were underage.

Journalist, Simon Williams, said “It’s been a jolly fun week with all the Brexit stuff, the Supreme Court thingy, and Greta Thurnberg telling all of those world leaders how rubbish they are at recycling.

“But it’s important to remember, amongst all of that noise, that one of the royal family MIGHT be a paedophile.

“And I can’t stress the word “MIGHT” enough, alongside “allegedly” and other such legal cushions.”

A palace spokesperson said “Oh, you’ve remembered that stuff. Dammit.

“We were kind of hoping that would just quietly go away, to be honest. It was hard enough work assassinating that Epstein chap.”

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