Tuesday 24 September 2019 by Lucas Wilde

Queen invites Boris Johnson to friendly meeting in Paris road tunnel


Queen to meet Boris in tunnel

The Queen is actually fine with the fact that Boris Johnson lied to her, according to reports this afternoon.

Her Majesty apparently heard the news that the Supreme Court declared the prorogation of parliament unlawful, and that the advice given to her by the Prime Minister had been misleading, without so much as a hint of displeasure.

“She’s fine and definitely didn’t smash a very expensive ming vase,” said Palace spokesperson, Simon Williams, emptying a dustpan full of unrelated china into a bin.

“In fact, Her Majesty is so ruddy fine about the whole thing that she would like to invite the Prime Minister on an all-expenses paid trip to Paris where they can have a nice chat about the future.

“The meeting will be in the Pont de l’Alma road tunnel.

“Yes, that one.

“Don’t get any ideas, it’s just a coincidence. Her majesty often holds meetings in tunnels. She’s a big fan of the acoustic advantages.”

Boris Johnson commented “RUFF RAH!

“What a jolly good sport her madge is. Not only being so understanding but inviting old Bozzer to paris for a natter and some tea. Marvellous.

“…not quite sure why she’s insisted that I drive to the meeting point alone but we all have our quirks.”

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