Brexit supporters shocked to learn World War II over

author avatar by 4 years ago

News that World War II concluded some 75 years ago has been met with shock and some confusion by Brexit supporters.

Historians were forced to reiterate that World War II came to an end several generations ago after leading Tories and other Brexit supporters continued use of words such as ‘surrender’, ‘enemy’ and ‘collaboration’ to characterise current EU relations.

“Well, I can’t believe it,” said a clearly shocked Derek Williams, a Brexit Supporter who keeps a well-maintained Anderson Shelter at the bottom of his garden in case the Blitz recommences.

“I was under the impression that the devilish hun was, at any point, set to launch a campaign to occupy Britain.

“That is one of the main reasons I voted to leave the EU as being in an administrative trading block with the enemy seemed contrary to our war aims.

“Does anyone want to buy a gas mask?”

However, others simply would not believe that the war is over.

“Nonsense!” cried Mark Francois, a Tory MP who has fought countless European campaigns in his own head.

“This is clearly some sort of nefarious ruse on the part of those dreadful Europeans to lull us into believing that the war ended seventy-five years ago so that we let our guard down and they march across the channel and make us all wear berets and eat garlic.

“Which the remainers probably want.”

It is understood that historians are waiting for the shock of the news that we are no longer at war to lessen before gently breaking it to leading Tories and Brexit supporters that we also no longer have an empire.