Wednesday 11 September 2019 by Neil Tollfree

Boris Johnson repeatedly steps on rake


boris steps on a rake

Prime Minister Boris Johnson has stepped repeatedly on the head of a rake leading to the handle smacking him in the face over and over again.

The incident took place over a period of nearly an hour earlier this morning after he had attempted to give a speech on why he is the only credible leader of the country.

“He was just walking around the shopping centre, trying to engage with normal people. It was creepy,” said a witness.

“All of a sudden, he stepped on the head of a rake and the handle just bounced up and smacked him in the face.

“It looked ever so painful. I mean, a rake handle smashing you in the face? It would hurt, wouldn’t it?”

The Prime Minister took a moment to compose himself.

“Yeah, he stepped back. Shook his head and laughed a little, like he couldn’t believe it had happened. But then he went forward again and stepped on the rake again.”

Again, it smashed Mr Johnson in the face.

“So he tried again, and stood on the rake again and got another whack in the face. He kept doing it over and over again, as his eyes got blacker and his nose more bloody.

“I left after half an hour. I mean, you wouldn’t have thought it, but apparently there’s only so many times you can watch Boris Johnson getting smacked in the face with a wooden rake handle.”

After an hour of repeatedly stepping on the rake, the Prime Minister’s team ushered him into the a car and he left.

It has been judged as one of the most successful days since Mr Johnson became Prime Minister.

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