Liverpool to prorogue Premier League until May 2020

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Current English Premier League leaders Liverpool have decided to prorogue the competition until Monday 18th May 2020 to ensure they win the title for the first time in 29 years.

The team currently hold a 2-point advantage over holders Manchester City and it is thought the only way to push through what they want is to suspend the competition so no-one can try to stop them getting what they want.

Captain, Jordan Henderson, who was selected by none of the large majority of fans, said, “We very much like the idea of getting our hands on the Premier League trophy, regardless of whether we do it the proper way, or by just changing the rules a bit to suit what we want.

“For too long, the metropolitan liberal elite like Man City, have subjected the country to their success by playing by the rules that were set up long ago by the undemocratic FA.

“Frankly, everyone is sick of these ‘experts’ at footballing skill winning everything by their nefarious methods of being better at putting the ball in the net than everyone else.

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“Millions of Liverpool fans demand a title, and we’re going to deliver it to them, so I don’t see how you can argue that our plan is undemocratic.

“It is time for a wholesale change of the way the game is run, and by suspending the competition until after the final matchday next May, we will get what we want and become richer to the cost of everyone else. Of course this is what the people want.”